SMALLVILLE Minicaps / Season 6, Eps. 5-8

11 Jan
The Smallville season 6 minicaps is wondering how it looks with its new green hoodie.

The Smallville season 6 minicaps is wondering how it looks with its new green hoodie.

Stewart here…

We started season six with Clark escaping from the Phantom Zone to defeat Zod possessed Lex.  While stopping Zod/Lex went well, his escape did allow some of the baddies in the Phantom Zone to arrive on Earth.  Speaking of bad news for Clark, Lana has moved in with Lex and they seem to be getting really cozy.  On the other hand, Clark finds he has some help in the crime-fighting department with the arrival of Oliver Queen in Metropolis, who happens to also dabble in running around fighting crime in a green hood and shooting arrows.  So, let’s see what happens now…

“Reunion”

Remember that little exchange earlier this season about both Lex and Oliver being at the same boarding school?  Well, the past comes back to haunt both of them as classmates they know are getting picked off in unusual ways.  And surprise, surprise, its all connected to a dark secret that Lex and Oliver have been carrying all this time and an experiment in psychic projection that Lionel has been running.  The moral here is: keep track of people you’ve left near dead, because someone’s dad may inadvertently turn them into a comatose telekinetic nightmare.  These Smallville moral lessons are weird, man.

–Thank Chloe for the whole “Zoners” tag for the escapees of the Phantom Zone from here on in.

–Leave it to Lois to deflate Clark’s old “I have to lie to protect the people around me” chestnut.

–Is it really shocking to see young Lex turn on Duncan by beating him near death after making their alliance just to impress Oliver and company?  I think not.

I don't recall my class reunion having such a surprising moment.

I don’t recall my class reunion having such a surprising moment.

–That was a nice Final Destination turn with that giant sword killing Alden in the cold opening.

–Hey, Raya’s alive!  Which we will get to about…now.

“Fallout”

Raya returns, surprisingly not dead, to help Clark out with a few things, like that shut-down fortress and accepting your destiny stuff.  And it’s a good thing too, because one of those crappy CG phantom from the Zone has taken over a human and is looking for Kal-El and that Brainiac trinket from the season opener.  She gets killed, and Clark decides to accept his destiny once the Zoners are dealt with.  Plus, Lex lied to Lana about the Brainiac trinket (big surprise there) and gets Jimmy demoted to the Daily Planet basement with Chloe.  And the fortress gets powered back up thanks to the Jor-El super amulet, which is good news since the electric companies don’t like installing power lines out in the arctic.

–Lex conspiring with the Egyptians, Jimmy?  I know Lex is shady, but I’ve seen enough iconography to know those kryptonian symbols aren’t Egyptian.  And I’m sure Chloe feels a bit guilty for not correcting him on that, since his theory got him demoted.

–I’m struggling to remember the last time Lex had someone ejected from his mansion by security.  Jimmy sure made an impression.

–So yeah, Bow Wow is Phantom-possessed baddie of this ep.  Remember Bow Wow?  How ‘bout when he was Lil’?

Superman fought Lil' Bow Wow.  Yeah, that happened.

Superman fought Lil’ Bow Wow. Yeah, that happened.

–Icky hole through the chest death for Raya, and yet somehow, she’s still alive enough to talk to Clark before she dies.

–“What’s a ‘Cow’-El?”

“Rage”

After a nasty near-death experience, Oliver decides he needs to up his game as a hero the way most athletes do: by taking drugs to make him super-strong and invulnerable.  And like most athletes on drugs, he’s starting to show some pretty violent behavior towards everyone.  Plus, if the whole Lex/Lana relationship isn’t stomach churning enough for you, Lana being pregnant probably will do it.  Did I mention this is also the Thanksgiving episode?

–Lionel at the Kent’s dinner table for Thanksgiving is all kinds of disturbing.  He’s tried to kill these people for the last five seasons!  I mean…ow, my brain hurts.

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things shouldn't be there, because he tried to kill almost everyone at that table...

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things shouldn’t be there, because he tried to kill almost everyone at that table…

–It would be hard not to feel for Lana spending her Thanksgiving moping over being preggers with Lex’s kid (probably), but then again, she is spending it in what seems to be a pampered eating experience.  You can leave him, you know!

–I kind of have to go with drugged-up Oliver on this, Clark.  Probably best to not have saved Lex’s life with the serum, especially knowing he murdered the doctor who made it.

–So now Chloe has to hide Lana’s pregnancy from everyone, along with Clark’s secret.  Good thing this is season six Chloe instead of season one Chloe because that wouldn’t stay secret at all.

–“What is it with people wanting to protect me?”  It could be a bad taste in guys, Lana.  Could be.

“Static”

Lex gets shifted into a place where he can’t interact with anyone, while the culprit tries to get Lana to blow the lid off of Lex’s 33.1 lab.  So its up to Chloe and Jimmy to help Lana get Lex out.  Why them, you may ask?  Because Clark is a bit too busy hunting down a Zoner who sucks out people’s bone marrow.  He gets unexpected help in stopping the Zoner by a mystery super guy.  One that seems to have a fondness for Oreos.

–Of course Lionel moved 33.1 while Lex was imprisoned.  And now he wants to be a partner in it.  Makes that whole Thanksgiving dinner an episode ago a bit more icky, doesn’t it?

–Lex proposes to Lana, and she’s all good with illegally imprisoning and experimenting on meteor freaks, because, Lana’s that bipolar.

–You know it’s going to get messy with this Zoner when the bodies of the dead are being taken out in small plastic tubs.

–I’m not sure what people unaware of Martian Manhunter/John Jones thought when seeing those Oreos pop up.

"Come up here and catch me, Kent!  Oh you can't, because you still can't figure out how to fly!  Nyah nyah de nyah nyah!"

“Come up here and catch me, Kent! Oh you can’t, because you still can’t figure out how to fly! Nyah nyah de nyah nyah!”

–You might recognize Zone escapee Aldar as Dave Bautista, now former wrestler and currently playing for the other comics universe as Drax in Marvel’s upcoming Guardians of the Galaxy.

NEXT TIME:  Clark discovers a disturbing fate for Smallville’s immigrants in “Subterranean”, a gossip journalist is “dripping” with secrets in “Hydro”, Clark gets some superpowered help destroying Lex’s new project in “Justice”, and things aren’t what they seem when Clark’s world seems different in “Labyrinth”.

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