SMALLVILLE Minicaps / Season 4, Eps. 17-20

Smallville season four minicaps has to deal with the prom. It can’t be bothered with those pesky kryptonian artifacts right now.

Stewart here, and be warned of spoilers within…

Last time, Clark and some friends traveled to China to find one of those pesky kryptonian artifacts, and along the way, got tortured and had to fight a possessed Lana. Add to that, Clark has to deal with Lois Lane now living at the Kent farm and Lana having second thoughts about her boyfriend Jason (and really, what season of this show isn’t she having second thoughts in that department). Did I mention Clark and Lana are still in high school and somehow got tortured in a foreign country before graduating? Well, with almost all the artifacts found, let’s see what happens in this round of minicaps…

“Onyx”

Lex’s experiments with kryptonite and due to an accident that turns green kryptonite black, ends up splitting Lex in two! Like the classic Star Trek episode, “The Enemy Within”, there’s a good Lex and a really evil Lex. Good Lex gets locked up by his evil version, who decides to deal with our cast in particularly vile ways, while Clark tries to find a way to put good and evil Lex back together. One of my favorite episodes from this season, mostly because we get to see Michael Rosenbaum as Lex chew up the scenery as evil Lex, especially when he figures out a secret about Clark (which, surprise, he forgets about once he’s put back together).

“Yes! Show me your anger, boy!”

–Let’s look at evil Lex’s count of offenses: almost raping Lana, trying to kill Chloe and Clark, successfully killing the scientist involved in the experiment that twinned him, shooting Jonathan in the leg, and doing a Man in the Iron Mask job on good Lex.

–Apparently Lex’s dark half did one piece of serious damage: by turning Lionel back to being a bad guy after he seemed to really be turning over a new leaf. Oh, nuts.

–You’d think there would be an easier way to get rid of Clark and Chloe than just dropping a giant piece of ceiling on them, but, you get a “B” for effort, evil Lex.

–Look, I’m already hinky on Lex using kryptonite to make super crops, and this was before that experiment split him in two.

–“You were right all along, Mr. Kent. I am the villain of this story.”

–“We’re Luthors.”

“Spirit”

The senior prom is coming up, and in true Smallville fashion, gets insanely complicated when a vapid wannabe prom queen ends up in a car wreck, and her spirit is able to possess whoever she touches. The bad news multiplies when Chloe is surprisingly elected prom queen, and our vacuous ghost girl decides to destroy the festivities. It’s a more or less fun episode which has a lot of our cast acting like they are auditioning for Mean Girls.

–Bridget Crosby is found dead on the Luthor mansion grounds by Jason, and Lex hides the body before the police can investigate. The kick of it all is, is that Jason knows Crosby is dead before the body is found, and is in cahoots with his mom to make sure that body disappears by making Lex unknowingly clean up that mess. So, yeah…

–And that’s the other thing I have mixed feelings on: Jason being revealed to be a bad guy. Although, this does keeps Lana’s record of picking bad boyfriends intact. So, lose-win, I guess.

The new Chloe Sullivan action figure, complete with fire-mop action.

–Smart move on Clark’s part to have Jonathan on standby with some kryptonite to help expel Dawn to the afterlife or wherever if he got possessed by her. And good riddance to her, I say.

–I don’t know if you know this, but small towns in Kansas can get Lifehouse to play your senior prom. Probably easier to do that now than in 2005, but still…

–So, favorite Dawn possessed character? My pick would have to go to Martha.

–Clark to Chloe: “Maybe this time we won’t have any natural disasters.” Oh, Clark. Ever the optimist. And just before you decide to end the episode by dancing with Lana.

“Blank”

Clark has a hard time remembering things (let alone most of the characters on the show, if my previous posts have proven), but his trouble is caused by a confrontation with a superpowered thief who can wipe memories. It’s a good thing Chloe is around to keep the amnesiac Clark from revealing his secrets to people who would want to know, like say, Lex. Oh, and Lana wants to leave Jason, but he suggests that may not be a good idea, what with his mom and all.

–Jonathan and Martha aren’t in town this episode. You think Chloe might want to call them to let them know their adopted son has memory trouble…and can rip doors off the hinges.

Insert “walrus” joke here.

–At least the superpowered memory wiper has an interesting story instead of just being a plot device. I mean its bad enough to have the ability to wipe people’s memories, but that he got it by his scientist dad, who was covering up his accidental shooting of his other son? At least he’s nice enough to help Clark out by wiping the sheriff and Lois’ memories of seeing Clark in action.

–Great bit of delayed and ultimately pointless modesty from Chloe when hearing Clark has x-ray vision. Bad news: that ship sailed two seasons ago, Chloe.

Um, should Clark break the news to her about being checked out with x-ray vision or should we?

–Lex found one of Clark’s notes on the kryptonian artifacts while Clark was slow on the uptake. Uh-oh.

–Lois’ response to hearing Clark has amnesia…again: “Well, at least this time you have clothes on.”

–Clark asking about Lois: “Please tell me I’m not related to her.”

“Ageless”

Clark and Lana stumble upon an infant boy in a crater inside a field…and this sounds really familiar. Well, not quite, because the mother was human (before getting vaporized in said crater while giving birth, I mean), and said baby is expelling a lot of power the older he gets. Not good news for Clark and family, who take in the rapidly growing baby, and have to contend with baby Evan’s power endangering whoever is near him.

Clark Kent: he goes through red jackets and blue shirts like you go through toilet paper.

–Of course Genevive got Lionel out of prison to help her get those kryptonian artifacts. And of course, she probably regrets that after Lionel extorts her out of the artifact she has by poisoning her wine.

–Lana wants to play mom? Well, at least her track record on that is better than her taste in boyfriends.

–Maybe I’m alone on this, but letting Evan go after laying waste to a LexCorp lab with Clark and Lana probably isn’t a good idea, what with the whole destroying things when he has his “growth spurts” and all.

–When Lex mentioned to Clark that Evan’s samples could lead to some great scientific discoveries, I could hear myself think: “he’s going to hold that back, isn’t he?” Sure enough, I was right.

–“Go get ‘em, Speedy.”

NEXT TIME: Season four of the Smallville minicaps wraps up as Chloe and Lana are indefinitely trapped in high school in “Forever”, the Smallville High class of ’05 graduates with a send-off…of meteors hitting town in the season finale “Commencement”, plus a brief review of season four.