SMALLVILLE Minicaps / Season 2, Eps. 5-8

Smallville season two minicaps respects your privacy, unlike some people…Chloe.

Stewart here, and be warned of spoilers within…

So we started out season two with Clark Kent going back to high school after that horrible tornado that blew through last season. For the most part, everything’s normal. Except Pete now knows Clark’s secret. And Clark discovered red meteor rocks turn him all kinds of evil. And Lana probably broke up with Whitney while he’s serving overseas. And Chloe wants to be in the friend zone with Clark. And Lionel’s blind. So, normal. Let’s see where this installment of minicaps takes us, then…

“Nocturne”

Lana has a secret admirer leaving her poetry, and that admirer, Byron, is a teen locked in a cellar by a tough love father. Lana and Clark decide to help Byron and find there may be a reason he’s kept away from people. Like, “turning all super strong and violent” kind of reason. Also, Martha gets employed as Lionel’s new assistant, which I’m sure has nothing to do with her unusual son getting his attention. Suuurrrreeee…

–Its Pete’s first trip to the hospital! And its Lana’s…um…third? Fourth? Really, I’m going to lose count before I finish writing minicaps for this show.

–Hey, am I hallucinating this, or this plot seem like the plot for that new Beauty and the Beast show? Kristin Kreuk falls in love with hunky guy who goes feral and out of control? Just saying.

"I was trying to give you my jacket to stay waaarrrrmmmm!"

“I was just trying to give you my jacket to stay waaarrrrmmmm!”

–It was a smart move to cast Richard Moll as Byron’s dad, since you halfway expect him to be the bad guy of this episode, but find out his reasons for keeping his son locked away weren’t as evil as we thought.

–Clark’s not a poetry guy.

–“Lex? I can feel your smirk from here.”

“Redux”

There’s some family issues brewing this episode, like the strained relationship with Clark’s parents and Martha’s dad, plus Lana discovering the father she knew may not be her father. But seeing this is Smallville, family drama is not the big plot here. That goes to cheerleader Krissy, who seems to be sucking the youth out of boys at the high school. Oh, and Smallville High gets a new principal. Hopefully someone mentioned to him what happened to the last one, being turned into the filling of a car and wall sandwich and all.

–Smallville has a Goth. Singular. Progressive times.

–Kind of surprising to find Krissy isn’t a meteor freak but some other kind of anomaly. And then she quick ages into dust which is kind of a weak end to that plot.

Its kind of like a May 2002-December 1925 kind of relationship, I guess.

–Looks like Clark was unsuccessful in patching up the relationship between Jonathan and Martha’s father. But then we find out Jonathan and Martha wanted him away to protect Clark during his formative years.

–So the new principal got shafted by Lionel because he didn’t protect Lex when he was at that academy. Oh, those Luthors.

“Lineage”

Its more family drama in this episode, with Lana going to see the man who might be her real father, which doesn’t go well. But she has a cakewalk with family issues in comparison to Clark, who is greeted by a woman claiming to be his actual mother, and no, she’s not from space. We also get some more backstory here, like some flashbacks to the meteor shower and how deep the connection between the Kents and Luthors really is, and what was done to secure safety for infant Clark. And Lex gets taken hostage by Clark’s “mom”, so don’t think this episode is lacking in Clark doing his super-thing.

–Yeah, Chloe probably was out of bounds with that search for Clark’s birth parents that started the whole mess this episode, but come on, I just can’t stand to watch her cry. And that remark about her mom being gone kind of hurt, Clark. Just breaking my heart here. I’m gonna go grab a tissue and be right back.

Oh, you’re gonna cry. Please don’t, because I…sniff…oh man…I’m fine, I’m just frustrated…sniff…

–Of course Lionel would have a crappy Faustian deal for Jonathan to do to allow the Kents to adopt Clark. Even finding out his kid getting turned bald didn’t knock goodness into him.

–Good choice in guest stars this week with Blair Brown as the unstable Ms. Dunlevy.

–And how creepy was that scene with Ms. Dunlevy and Lionel? And keep in mind, he’s the blind one. Plus, it turns out his love child with her is alive…somewhere…

–And Mr. Small wants to get to know his maybe daughter Lana.

“Ryan”

Remember that psychic kid Ryan from last season, who went off to live with his family? Yeah, that didn’t go so well, and we find him escaping from a hospital experimenting with his abilities. You’d think Clark breaking him out would be good news, but then we find out Ryan doesn’t have long to live thanks to his gift. So we get a “very special episode of Smallville” ending for this episode and this round of minicaps.

Warrior Angel? Really? That’s the best title for a superhero comic you could come up with? What is this, the mid 1990s?

–Chloe knows an Austrian with a Vespa who works for the phone company. Such weird connections.

–That whole Summerholt plotline fell to the wayside pretty fast. I was expecting something sinister to happen on that end, but its probably for the best we get the climax we get.

–Before I forget, Martha has a secret she’s keeping from Jonathan and Clark. I wonder what that could be?

–So I have a theory: whenever Wiliam B. Davis shows up as one of your guest stars, he’s probably a bad guy.

–Oh, and Lana almost got moved to Metropolis thanks to Nell and Dean’s relationship, but comes up with a last ditch plan to stay in Smallville. So now we got Lana Lang: coffee shop owner, sophomore in high school, and now roomie with Chloe. Jeez, what an overachiever.

–“I have a fear of flying.”

–“You’re the luckiest guy I’ve ever met.”

NEXT TIME: A student mysteriously gets a date with both Lana and Chloe at the same time in “Dichotic”, ancient cave drawings point to Clark’s past in “Skinwalker”, Whitney returns not quite himself in “Visage”, Clark has to save hostages Lionel and Martha by making a big leap (literally) in “Insurgence”.